Screwtape on Worship

(Luke 9:23-26) He said to all of them, "Those who want to come with me must say no to the things they want, pick up their crosses every day, and follow me. Those who want to save their lives will lose them. But those who lose their lives for me will save them. What good does it do for people to win the whole world but lose their lives by destroying them? If people are ashamed of me and what I say, the Son of Man will be ashamed of those people when he comes in the glory that he shares with the Father and the holy angels.

My Dear Wormwood,

If your patient is a Christian, he will likely find himself engaged in worship of the Enemy, and since the Enemy uses this act to bless your patient, you must either prevent him from doing so, or considerably more difficult, see that his worship is of limited value. Of course, in the latter case, we're dealing with the Word of the Enemy, which is a bit like trying to put out a fire with kerosene. It can be done, but it can also have volatile results.

Your best option is to convince him to avoid worship altogether. Using the classic "spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak" gambit, humans can often be convinced that a soft pillow is preferable to an encounter with infinite love. If his local congregation has weeknight services, point out to him how many other responsibilities he has, like washing dishes or watching TV.

If he feels compelled to go, take that compulsion, and overemphasize it. I know this may seem counterproductive, but if he's going strictly out of a sense of duty, he'll soon lose that feeling, or you can point out to him that he's met some imaginary quota, that praying before meals is "good enough," or some other such nonsense. Even though worship services are more like spiritual birthday parties, where the Enemy gives priceless gifts to his unworthy children, they tend to look for excuses not to go, so all you need to do is give them one.

This brings us to the next strategy: tell your patient that by going to worship, he's somehow doing the Enemy a favor, as if the Creator of heaven and earth somehow needs the worship of His followers. Keep him from seeing that the Enemy shares His love through nearly every element in the liturgy, especially since most of the liturgy is taken straight from His faith-feeding Bible. Keep him from discovering the truth that the reason it's called "Divine Service" is because in it, the Enemy serves His people.

By seeing the service as an act of obedience, your patient can be lulled into just going through the motions and feeling like he's done his duty. Prayers, hymns, and canticles can be said and sung from memory without ever thinking about a single word uttered. Readings and sermons can be drowned out by an infinite number of distracting thoughts, anything to keep him from hearing and contemplating the Word!

If he insists on choosing worship over other forms of entertainment, insist that worship is, in fact, just that: entertainment. As such, if he doesn't experience at least one emotional experience, preferably more, then he got nothing out of the service, ignoring the reality that the Enemy works through His Word regardless of feelings and emotions, and that this spiritual growth and sustenance has infinitely greater value than something that merely stimulates a gland.

In combination with these efforts, I adjure you to work not only on the patient directly, but on his worship environment. Coordinate with your colleagues to manipulate the service itself. Encourage them to choose music and other elements that people like for their musical quality and sentimentality instead of their Biblical content. Note that this tactic can apply to any style, whether ancient or contemporary, as the past was as rife with vacuous hymns as today. Speaking of styles, keep them arguing over the importance particular man-made genres as if the organ (or the electric guitar, depending on the preference) was handed down from heaven with the Ten Commandments. Leave them arguing over specific styles instead of working together to accomplish the Enemy's mission.

Most importantly, remember that the Enemy's most powerful work is done in a worship setting. There, He proclaims to them the message of unconditional love through His Word and Sacraments. Do whatever you can to keep your patient from hearing again that the Enemy has forgiven his sins and freely given him eternal life.

Your affectionate uncle

SCREWTAPE

Now the peace of God, which passes all understanding, keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Amen.